The History of Thanksgiving...

We've all heard the story.  Some of us have even been blessed enough to perform in a Thanksgiving Day skit in Elementary school.  Let's refresh:
The year is 1621 and the Plymouth colonists and the Wampanoag Indians share feast together.  For years afterwards, people continued having these feasts until President Lincoln, during the Civil War, declared Thanksgiving a national holiday.
This holiday has been always been a holiday where people come together.  A holiday to unite despite differences.  The Natives and the Colonists had a tumultuous relationship, always changing.  And yet they had a grand feast together and sat down as equals.  During the Civil War, America was at war with itself.  Brother was fighting against brother.  People didn't realize what they were fighting for... they just wanted their sons to come home.  During the treacherous time, President Lincoln was determined to unite the country.  Part of his solution... make Thanksgiving a national holiday.  Today, people gather across the country (even the world) to celebrate the things and people they are thankful for.  They gather with friends and family... those that are important to them.  There's a ton of food, 3 football games, and laughs (usually).
To me, here's the irony.  How much progress has actually been made in these almost 400 years?  Has the country united or are we still separated by our differences?  Do we appreciate and respect all the people that are different from us, or do we stand by, judging, determining what is right and what is wrong?  Do we sit down at a table with those that are different and see them as equals, or do we only sit down with those that are close to us... those that we already love.  I am NOT saying that we are improperly celebrating our holiday.  On the contrary.  I strongly believe that we should celebrate all our holidays with the people who are most important to us.  Instead, I'm suggesting that we branch out as a nation and truly work to unite ourselves.  Find your opposite and learn to love them.  Maybe someday people won't talk about race, because it won't be a big deal.  Maybe someday people won't talk about any of our differences, because we will all be accepted for who we are, what we wear, what we believe, etc.  We will be seen as humans... as Americans.  Nothings else.  I believe that we all have good in them... no matter what... and we all need to take the time to see that good.  Then maybe that first Thanksgiving will be demonstrated throughout America everyday, not just on one Thursday in November.


"For, in the final analysis, our most basic common link is that we all inhabit this small planet. We all breathe the same air. We all cherish our children's future. And we are all mortal." - President John F. Kennedy


"I know in my heart that man is good. That what is right will always eventually triumph. And there's purpose and worth to each and every life." - President Ronald Reagan


"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves. " - President Abraham Lincoln

A Day to be Thankful

And so it is... a day to be VERY thankful!  Here are the things I'm thankful for in this year of 2010:

• I am married to a wonderful man for over a year.  We have two crazy, silly dogs that make us smile and keep us entertained.  My husband is caring and patient and reminds me how much he loves me everyday.  We have a home, are financially stable, and are happy. :)
• I have a career that I love.  Even though the job has some flaws and causes me a ridiculously large amount of stress, I love my students and I'm happy to be able to have a job right now.
• I have a phenomenal family.  An amazing brother and sister-in-law who live only an hour north of us.  Fantastic parents who constantly make me laugh and proud to be their daughter.  My in-laws are amazing!  We just had a wonderful 5-way Oovoo chat, making me so thankful they value family as much as I do.  My family is also blessed to be adding one more addition... a new adopted baby boy will be joining my brother-in-law and sister-in-law.  
• I am blessed with amazing friends!  Ever since moving to this city, my friends have been as close as family.  In fact, we're going to have Thanksgiving dinner with some friends today.  Our friends are amazing, supportive, funny, and great people.  We are blessed.

I am very happy to currently have a break and some relaxation.  And I am thankful for another wonderful year.

".... believe in a love that is being stored up for you like an inheritance, and have faith that in this love there is a strength and a blessing so large that you can travel as far as you wish without having to step outside it."
— Rainer Maria Rilke (Letters to a Young Poet)

A healthy past-time...

Growing up, I never played video games.  We had an old school Nintendo, but that was my brother's and I was never allowed to play.  It's okay, though... I didn't think I was really missing out on much.  Now... things have changed.  When I got married, my husband had a Wii and a PlayStation 3.  I didn't think much about either until I played Batman Lego on the PS3.  Yes, I know, a kids game.  I had to start easy. Now, one of my favorite past-time games... Assassin's Creed.  It's all based in historical fact, so nerdy me can meet Leonardo Da Vinci, the Templars, Niccolo Machiavelli, and others.  I can was Venice as it's being constructed and Rome at it's height.  The more I speck, the more nerdy I realize I am... but I'm okay with that.  
Now, just to clarify, I am not someone who stays up at all hours in order to play video games, but sometimes my brain can't focus enough to read my book (currently reading "The Road") and sometimes I just can't find a good movie to watch.  Although I've been watching Law and Order:SVU on netflix, I strongly encourage myself to take a break from that as well.
Anyway, husband and I recently bought Assassins Creed: Brotherhood.  Since Husband is a MUCH better game player than me, I now just relax and watch the game like it's a movie.  Every now and again I chime in with "It's the Colosseum" or "Oh Machiavelli".  
This is an excellent way to enjoy the weekend without stress. :)


“There are no classes in life for beginners; right away you are always asked to deal with what is most difficult” -Rainer Maria Rilke

I hope to not lose hope...

Well... here's where I'm at right now.  
I dread Monday morning meetings.  I dread emails from my principal.  I dread anytime he comes up to me in the hallway or walks into my classroom.  Why?  Because it's never going to turn out in my favor.  Usually it means I'm not doing something right, or I have to add more work to what I already do, OR I have another template to fill out properly instructing me on how to spell my name.  Fabulous.
About a week ago (on Veteran's Day) I took a personal day to spend time with my Veteran.  It was an AMAZING day... we just hung out, ran some errands (we have to take a Best Buy timeout...) and lounged around the house together.  It was so relaxing I didn't mind waking up and going to work the next day (although, I'll admit it was easier to know that it was Friday).  That amazing time off feeling lasted until about Monday.  The past few days have been a struggle again.  As I was driving home from work yesterday, I really wanted to figure out what was making me so unhappy.  
Was it the kids?  No.  I love my kids.  They're a challenge, but full of heart and spirit.  They are determined to succeed (usually) and they make me laugh.  The kids would be my biggest reason to stay.
Was it teaching?  No.  I really love teaching.  There's  a lot of work involved, but I love seeing the kids figure things out and start to be remotely interested in history.  I love talking to the kids a year later and have them tell me about something we did or learned the year before.  Those things stick with them.  I love helping the students realize that they have a ton of potential and can succeed in life, no matter what other people tell them.  No... it definitely isn't the teaching.
So what's left?  The hoops.  I cannot stand the hoops and I can't function being forced to live within the box.  I don't mind having to abide by the box every now and them, but to never be allowed to leave the box.  I like to have the freedom to be creative.  I sometimes have my most creative ideas about 10 minutes before my class, BUT the end of the world would occur if I changed my lesson and don't have it written down a week before hand.  Thankfully, this year I have been very good about keeping work at work and enjoying home time with my husband and dogs.  But I know I won't be able to keep trucking through this and always seeing the best sides.  I can't keep dodging my principal.  
I hope that I don't lose hope.  I hope that I don't lose faith in what I've been working my whole life to become.  It's been almost 20 years since I decided I was going to be a teacher, and I hope that I don't give up forever.  Maybe just a new district...
On a happy note, some of my students told me on Monday that I am an inspiring person.  That brought a smile to my face and lifted my heart.  :)


"The great renewal of the world will perhaps consist in this, that man and maid, freed of all false feelings and reluctances, will seek each other not as opposites, but as brother and sister, as neighbors, and will come together as human beings." - Rainer Maria Rilke

Today's Quote

“Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.”
-Rainer Maria Rilke

I could never work in a corporate business... and it's all my mom's fault

It was the week of career day, and somehow, for the past 2 years, I've been "co-chair" for this event.  Last year, my partner and I got 10 people to attend career day, and things went pretty smoothly.  We were efficient and everything went pretty well.
This year, however, it was not so.  We added a third helper.  Another councilor we'll call Charlie.  Charlie is a great councilor.  He has the kids trust, they'll talk to him about everything, and he can fix tons of their issues.  BUT, as an organized man, he is NOT!  Charlie has a ton of contacts for events like career day.  After all, he's a retention specialist (works towards keeping kids in school and helping them find career/college contacts).  So, let me tell you why I could never work in the corporate business world...
I was in charge of scheduling the kids to see different careers and match them with ones that they would enjoy.  I spent HOURS working on these schedules.  My school has about 150 students and each had to have 5 different courses.  The day of Career Day I was awake at 3am to finish the schedules.  We had 16 different possible careers.  I had personally arranged 4 of them... and was stalking those 4 to make sure they were there on time, prepared, and still able to make it.  The rest were arranged by Charlie.  I was constantly confirming with Charlie to verify what he heard from those people.  
So there I'm sitting on the morning of Career Day.  Cup #4 of coffee halfway done.  I was finishing up the last of the schedules while my other parter was creating the classroom attendance sheets.  Charlie was popped his head in and told us he was going to post signs saying which job is in which room.  About 5 minutes later, he pokes his head in and asks, "Who did we get for the parole officer?"  My response... stare baffling at Charlie and then say, "Are you joking?"  "No"... laughing.  Then it dawned on me... Charlie didn't confirm the parole officer.  Either that or I screwed up big time.  So I check my records of our meetings... because, yes, I took notes while we were meeting.  It definitely had a name next to the P. O.  So, now I start to panic.  I had a feeling our tattoo artist/business owner was going to cancel (they tend to be VERY flaky), and now we had no P. O.  Crap.  My heart starts to race a little more and I begin to worry.  How much more work do I have to do?  How am I going to reschedule these kids?
Little did I know, this was ONLY the beginning.  The Lawyer/Judge had to go to trial and didn't show up.  The cosmetologist didn't show up.  The fireman didn't show.  And the tattoo artist didn't show up, as I predicted.  That's 5 people who failed us (none of which were the people I set up, by the way).  My partner and I spent the day rearranging students, and thanks to one of our fellow co-workers, we got an FBI guy in to fill a space.  Thankfully Career Day only lasted from 9 - 12, because I couldn't have survived any longer than that.  
Here's the thing... in the corporate world people have to micromanage and plan and organize, and I cannot function properly if one of my team members drops the ball.  It took about 7 cups of coffee to make it to noon, and even more to make it until 4 (the end of the school day). 
There's still one more part I haven't addressed.  How is this Mum's fault?  My mum worries like it's going out of style.  Everything causes her to worry.  Growing up, I thought it was crazy how worried she would get about everything!  Little did I know I would turn out just like her.  I can't function without worrying about everything.  And therefore, no corporate business career for me... I suppose that's okay, because I really do love teaching.  BUT, there are reasons why I am not a micromanaging teaching.  I'm a go-with-the-flow, roll-with-the-punches, list-making-planner, outside-the-box teacher.  And anytime people attempt to put me in a box, I have a breakdown and panic... and then I revolt.


Quote for the day:
“...perhaps all the dragons of our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us once beautiful and brave. Perhaps everything terrible is in its deepest being something helpless that wants help from us.”
-Rainer Maria Rilke
(My new favorite poet...)

Another drop in the bucket...

Ah... finals!  Do you know what I do all day when the kids are taking their finals?  Nothing... at least I'm not SUPPOSE to do anything.  In reality, I try to get my grades in order, since they're due on Monday.  I try to plan some lessons for the new trimester.  And I read emails.  Since teachers aren't allowed to leave their rooms while testing is occurring, we can't socialize with each other.  So we email.  The thought of it makes me chuckle a little bit.  I was actually emailing my friend, who was just across the hall.  Of course or emails were brainless, but that's the best part.  We got to be brainless at work for a little while. :)


While we were testing, however, my principal sent out an email detailing how we were going to have to have our unit plans turned in on Friday and from now on they're always due a week before we teach them. Not a bad thing, until you realize that before the end of the day on Friday we have to have our grades done.  My district tests I give have to be graded in front of administration... I'm forbidden from having them unsupervised... which means I can't take them home to grade.  And let me tell you... reading student's paragraphs and determining their grades takes longer than it sounds.  I'm guessing our principal has no concept of how full our bucket really is.  He's not realizing that one drop will cause us to overflow... and that drop is coming soon.


I was talking to my friend about it today at work, and my principal's micromanaging has reminded me of something.  Let me tell you a brief story.  When I was doing my first student-teaching, I had this amazing cooperating teacher, Bob.  He was phenomenal.  Anyway, I taught a lesson that was really good on paper, but the execution was faulty.  I did some on the spot changing, but nonetheless, it was a flop.  I talked to my teacher about it later, and was crushed because I'd never had a lesson fail before.  He told me something I'd never forget.  Bob told me that every teacher has lessons that fail, and not just when they're new teachers.  The key to great teachers is that they recognize that they failed that day, and they know WHAT failed about the lesson.  They don't always know why the students don't understand a part, but they know what part the students don't get.  So let me tie this back to the present.  My great concern right now is that my principal is doing all of this micromanaging and changing things all over the place and isn't realizing that it is failing.  Every time someone talks to him about it, he doesn't think those feelings apply to the whole school, or he just thinks that people feel like this because his ideas are new.  I'm concerned that he won't realize things are failing, will continue on this path, and will make life at school miserable.  He'll force teachers to just spend their days trying to figure out how to jump through specific hoops and not coming up with creative ideas on how to teach our kiddos.


For now, point me in the direction of my hoop and hope I don't get burned as I jump through...


Some closing thoughts for today:
"I am a firm believer in the people.  If given the truth, they can be depended on to meet any national crisis.  The great point is to bring them the real facts."
-President Abraham Lincoln
"In three words I can sum up everything I have learned about life: it goes on." 
-Robert Frost
"The strength of the United States is not the gold at Fort Knox or the weapons of mass destruction that we have, but the sum total of the education and the character of our people."
-Claiborne Pell

A Day of Peace...

I know this is horrible to say, but it's true.  Today was a day of peace.  Usually on Mondays we have a meeting from 8 - 10.  I know... you might as well just say we have a death sentence every Monday.  With the exception from today and one other day, our monday meetings are the most painful, excruciating things.  Let me be honest... I've never had an enema, but I'm pretty sure it's more pleasant than our monday meetings.
BUT, today was different.  My principal called in sick today, so our dean of student, Mrs. Chaz, and our Assistant Principal, Mrs. Wendski, had to lead our meeting.  FANTASTIC!  The meeting was short and sweet... RIGHT to the point!  Amazing!  Any time someone attempted to keep the meeting going longer than necessary, they cut them short.... said to talk to them individually so the rest of us could go free.  It was beautiful!  And then... to actually have time to prepare for the day before kids came was fantastic!
I know... It's not nice to say that today was a great day because my boss was out sick with the flu.  I'm sorry he has the flu, but it was a great day without Big Brother watching over my shoulder.
Only a few more days until Big Brother begins to collect my unit plans that I have to write using a VERY specific template (because we all know that everyone thinks and works exactly alike), so I will relish my day of peace.  Who knows when another one will come around...