As all weeks do, this week has definitely had its ups and downs. And, to clarify, this week's downs have been REALLY far down. This week's ups have been small ups, but ups none the less...
I already mention the disaster that happened with the test, and I woke up fresh on the Thursday determined to make it a great day. I even went to Starbucks and got a grande skinny vanilla latte and a sausage sandwich. To me, that said "Amazing start to a wonderful day". Well... that's not exactly how the rest of the day worked out. I had to still give 3 district assessments and immediately after our morning meeting, I and my co-worker found out we had to have an administrator in our classroom as we proctored the tests. In addition, we had to write a letter explaining what we did and why we did it. Well, that was frustrating, but I figured it was just red tape. To be honest, I had absolutely no idea how someone could believe I was cheating to improve my kids' test scores (which, in my district means improving my pay). I don't mean to sound snobby, but I don't care about the money. I don't teach for the money. And I think these tests are ridiculous and don't even want to force my kids to take the tests.
Well, I went about my day, only to be confronted by my principal before my 3rd hour class. No where in our discussion did he make any comment about understanding any of my actions, just continued to tell me what I did wrong and what I should have done. I don't consider myself a stupid person, so I was getting frustrated with this repeated conversation. I shut down and became completely unreceptive to my principal. The thing is, I usually have a great relationship with my principal, and I KNOW he always goes out of his way to protect us, but that was not what it felt like this time.
My principal decided to have my co-worker, Lily, talk to me, since we were in the same boat with this. So, we chatted, and she told me I needed to "clarify" my letter I wrote... apparently my letter sounded like I was justifying my actions, and justification, to administration, means I cheated.
The day went on, and I finally got to a point when I wasn't emotional at all... I was all business. I began looking for new social studies teaching jobs, and ironically I found a part time job in another district. The catch... the job was closing the day before so I had little time to apply. I spent part of one class (while my kids were working on their independent study class) revising my resume. Then I had to figure out how to ask my principal and vice principal to write me a letter of recommendation without being rude.
Although it was still splotchy, Charisma had attempted to make me feel better by telling me I looked pretty... which made me crack up laughing!!
Friday came about, and to start off the day, I went back to Starbucks. THIS TIME, it was going to work! I bought co-workers coffee, and myself coffee AND an apple fritter. Sugar beats all! :) It worked. Friday turned out to be a great day we all survived. Some students had found out that Lily and I were almost fired and they came to us with comforts of "Miss, if that'd happen, I'd protest! I wouldn't come to school anymore." Granted, we don't want our students to stop coming to school no matter what, but it was a sweet thought and makes me love my kids even more.
Thankfully it's the weekend, and I get to relax with friends and an amazing husband! (And go to see if my car, Sophia, is truly dying... the day may come when she has to get sold...)
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