Title unsure...

I suppose it's time for an update... and quite the day for that...


It's the third week of school, and here's what I have to say:
1.  I have PHENOMENAL kids this year.  I have NO idea what happened over the summer, but this is definitely a HUGE change!  I've never noticed these big changes before, but I love that I have kids that, at least for now, want to be successful in school.  It makes my heart float.
2.  I am in FULL anticipation of stresses to come from district assessments determining my paycheck and district administration arriving in my classroom sporadically throughout the school year for whatever reason they determine...


And 3.  Today was the first day I had to give my students a district assessment, and it was AWFUL!!!  Let me give some brief (or hopefully brief) background...


The school district I work for decided to start a "pay-for-performance" plan, meaning teachers will be paid based on how successful their students are... which is determined by district and state tests!!  I teach World History, American History, Government, and Geography, which are NOT state tested subjects.  So, most of my pay is based on the district tests.  Now, OBVIOUSLY I did not get into teaching for the money.  That's never been a true teacher's goal.  It's very frustrating to even link teaching with determining my pay... so weird!!  I really just want to teach!  I LOVE to talk to students and discuss and watch their faces when they figure something out!  That is why I love teaching! 
Okay... back to being brief... these district tests are created by teachers and retired teachers.  Then the creators have to write up an "item map", which basically is a sentence about what each question is regarding.  So, for example, if I was going to write a question about limiting the power of our government's branches, I may write a comment that says "checks and balances in American Government".  Anyway, the students are given 3 assessment sets, which are suppose to be short answer responses and about 4 - 5 questions.    Then they will take one bigger, multiple choice test at the end of the course that is suppose to determine whether or not the kids learned anything.  (I'll try to be more objective from this point on... yeah right...)  


So... if I attempt to explain more, it will get WAY to unnecessarily complicated... I gave my first assessment set today.  Oh wait... one more back story...


Yesterday, my principal stopped in for a spot observation (15 minute observation to help me become a better teacher) in my last period class.  I thought we had a great lesson... kids were engaged, discussing, and attempting to come up with a compromise between the northern and southern states.  After school, he spent OVER AN HOUR talking to me about my lesson and teaching habits.  Here's a tip.  You know the conversation is not going to go well when it begins with your principal says "OK... we need to be done with potential."  Thus starts an hour of biting the inside of your mouth so you don't have an emotional breakdown... and might I add, it doesn't help if you spouse is out of town when all this goes down...


So, as I was saying, the assessment set.  For legal reasons (aka I could lose my job) I can't tell you exactly the questions on the test, BUT, I can tell you this.  In geography, the students had to interpret a map, BUT in order to interpret, students needed to be able to tell the difference between the colors on the map.  Not a problem, UNLESS YOUR TEST IS IN BLACK AND WHITE!!  It is VERY hard to determine the difference between yellow, orange, and white when there is only black and white.  In addition, how fair is it to be testing kids on interpreting a geography map but ask them questions about historical events in American history THAT THEY MAY NOT HAVE LEARNED YET?  Especially NOT in geography class!  So what happens, you ask?  I allow the students to use a map of the United States that gives the state names (because, yes, my kids don't know the 50 states) and I have the audacity to tell the kids what the questioners meant when they asked them to find "trends" in a bar graph.  The result is my principal (whom I normally have a great relationship with) giving me a HUGE lecture on how all of that was wrong.  


Have you ever had one of those moments when you REALLY feel like crying, and you're doing whatever it takes to NOT cry (including biting the inside of your lips and staring at ANYTHING except people, because one look from a person will make you cry)?  Well, that was me today at the end of lunch, before my 4th hour class while my principal was telling me all the things I did wrong and me be frustrated because these tests should NOT be held against the students. (Did I mention our principal is making these 4 tests count as 50% of our students grades?!?!)  And the result?  My principal would NOT stop talking to me, and I started to cry. 


Yup... middle of the school day I ACTUALLY have a bit of a breakdown.  I'm not talking sobbing, just tears running down my face and I can't make them stop, no matter how hard I try.  And what happens next?  My principal keeps talking to me... while I'm crying!  Then he goes in to cover the first few minutes of my class so I can regroup. 


I don't know if any of you have ever seen me after crying, but I become ridiculously splotchy.  Even without tears, the feeling of being about to cry makes my face become splotchy.  NOT easy to cover up in 5 minutes and be a responsible teacher for the rest of the day.  It completely sapped me of all desire to work for the rest of the day... which actually infuriated me, because I LOVE TEACHING!!!  I haven't had a day like this since I started teaching, so I suppose I'm due.  To be honest, though, I'd much rather be breaking up fights than having emotional breakdowns at school...


All I keep thinking is that tomorrow is a new day... more easily said than done...
So, I resort to doing nothing for the rest of this evening and thinking about my man Ralph Waldo Emerson, who said:


"Finish each day and be done with it.  You have done what you could.  Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can.  Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense."


Off to bed I go, in hopes of following Emerson's wise, sage advice.

The start of a new year...

"You cannot teach a man anything; you can only help him discover it within himself." -Galileo Galilei
And so it has begun!!  The first week of the new school year has been completed!  It's amazing how summer just suddenly ended and I wasn't ready for the first day, and yet, after the first week it's back to the natural swing of things.
We're really lucky this year to have such a great group of new students.  It's always sad when I lose a bunch of my favorites to graduation.  We never know what types of kids we're going to get the next year.  Last year we got a HUGE influx of new students.  They were young, mostly freshman and sophomores, which for us, means they are GROSSLY immature.  Immaturity and behavior issues in an alternative equals continual drama.  This made for a VERY long year... very exhausting, to be quite honest.
BUT, this year we have a great group of students.  So far, with few exceptions, the students are very hard-working and REALLY want to succeed in school.  I know that it's only the beginning of the second week, and there is still PLENTY of time for students to cause me grief, but my hopes are high for many of these students.  I think this will be a great year!!
My only hesitation still has to do with the district changes, BUT I've decided since I can't change anything right now, I'm going to do my best to accept the changes and roll with the punches.  We can find out what works and what doesn't and make changes based on that.  No reason to stress over something I can't change.  It reminds of one of my favorite quotes by Ralph Waldo Emerson... a nice reminder that we just don't always have control of things, but we can find a way to move on:
"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense."

Back to School...

Well... the time has almost arrived.  It's a love/hate time of year.  On the one hand, it was really really nice to be back in my classroom and be surrounded by my goofy coworkers!  I was even fortunate enough to be able to use their children as slave labor!  UNFORTUNATELY, at the end of each year, I'm a disaster, which I then have to pay for at the beginning of each year.  Whoops!  Oh well.

I've continued working on my wall maps.  It's too sad that my students don't travel.  They're happy if they get a chance to leave the city!  So, in response to this, I created two big maps on my bulletin boards.  One is a map of the United States and the other is a map of the world.  Last year, I added photos of places I'd been so students would get the chance to see what other places look like.  This year I had the idea of asking friends/family to help build the map more... send photos that I could add to expand my students view of the world.  As it is, most of my students are from a low S.E.S., have either broken or extremely screwed up home lives, and many are involved in gangs and/or drugs.  Their view of life is low.  It is not easy and many don't see a way out.  The best I can do, besides attempt to help them realize their vast amounts of potential, is to show them the parts of the world they may not get to see... good parts... beautiful parts.  I want my students to dream... maybe they'll dream of visiting other areas, and their dreams may help them see that it is possible for them.

I haven't gotten much more done on my room, but I have done my most favorite part of going back to school.  BACK-TO-SCHOOL SUPPLY SHOPPING!!  I don't know what it is about new pens, new notebooks, post-its, etc, but I LOVE them!!  They just brighten my day and get excited!!!  They're so perfect, just waiting to be used.  Notebooks ready to be full of information.  Colorful post-its just waiting to be put all over my desk or used as a bathroom pass.  Aaaaa... I love new supplies.  As a treat, I even bought myself some new colorful gel pens.  It really makes planning and grading a bit more fun. :)


The other upside to going back to school?  My crazy, wonderful coworkers!  It was so great to see them, chat with them, and laugh with them again!!

The big downside?  Our new pay plan starts this year.  We are going to be paid based on how well our students do on standardized tests.  I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO not a fan of this!  It's actually stressful to think about it!  I have no doubt that I and my fellow colleagues are great teachers, BUT how are my students suppose to demonstrate their knowledge if they write as well as fifth graders?  It makes me so mad that no one has come up with a better idea!  And my district is all about doing things ONLY one way... no alternative means of testing.  The only exception is if students had modifications on the state test, but that doesn't help if students can't write.  They still have to do their own writing.  My current plan for surviving this stress?  Taking "me" time.  I already told my husband that at least once a month I'm going to do something stress-free, like a massage or a monthly pedicure.  And my weekends will have to be full of school-free things.  I've also decided I HAVE to try and find a way not to bring work home with me.  It's a must!

Well... to end on a happy thought... I soon have the chance to see all the changes made in my students over the summer... hopefully they're all good changes! :)

P. S. All photos are complimentary of either myself or my wonderful friends/family sharing their photos! :)

Closing time...

It's closing time of the summer... and it's still brought to my attention that people think a teacher's life is all fun and good.  Yes, it is VERY true that I have had the luxury of not working and simply vacationing this summer.  BUT, as with many jobs, it is CRUCIAL to stay up to date on many things in my particular profession.

For example, seeing as I teach history, and I'm living in a state I was not born and raised, I have spent a hunk of my summer working on learning more about my region.  The best part of history is when students can relate history to their lives.  Then I spent some time digging through local archives to create assignments based on primary sources.  The best history is taught hands on and left to the interpretation of the learners, NOT the interpretations of textbook authors.  I have also had to spend time creating quality lesson plans in order to not bore my students during class time and so I don't feel so overwhelmed before lessons.  I feel prepared!

Globe in Marseilles, France

Now... time to mourn.  My summer is closing.  I go back to work on August 5.  A few thoughts about this amazing summer.  It has be wonderful that for the first time since I was in high school, I did not have to work a summer job.  I spent my days advancing my historical knowledge, planting trees (including my lilacs!) in our new and unfinished backyard, unpacked boxes that have been packed since 2001, and other chores around our new house.  In addition, there has been a WONDERFUL vacation that helped remind me what true relaxation is and WHY I love and study history.  The world holds so many amazing things and people.  It is so important for students to learn about these people and places, to learn about the world.  Even more so because many of my students will never travel outside this state.  They will have not other concept of other places around the globe.  And so... I have had a great chance to prepare ways of teaching them... and since I've relaxed, I'm much happier to go back into school and work to ignore all the changes (that I don't necessarily agree with) in my district.

Gengenbach, Germany

Statue of The Kissers in San Diego, CA

Fort Worth, TX

Port in Savona, Italy

The Mediterranean Sea outside of Savona, Italy

  

Vacation!

I admit, the only thing better than summer arriving is actually taking a vacation during summer time!  It is the one time of the year when school REALLY gets left behind.  No school work.  No phone calls about school.  No thinking about school whatsoever!  AMAZING!!  


And where did the husband and I vacation to?  Europe!!  A phenomenal place for a history teacher to adventure to! :)  Here are a few brief history highlights:


Marseilles, France - 


Home to Chateau d'If, the famous prison island that is also used as the setting of Alexander Dumas' novel "Count de Monte Cristo"... Ahhh Edmonde Dantes...

Notre Dame de la Garde is also there... an old cathedral that was also used as a military post from as far back as 5 AD.

This says "This wall bears the marks of the battle for the liberation of Marseilles. 15 - 25 August 1944"

The Isle of Elba - famously known for the island Napoleon Bonaparte was exiled to.

 (It was a night sighting of Elba)

Pompeii in Italy - 


The ruins of the ancient city of Pompeii.  AMAZING!  This city was flourishing until the volcanic eruption of Mount Vesuvius in 74 AD.  The volcanic eruption actually preserved the city, leaving MANY aspects intact!!

The city of Carthage in Tunisia - 

This city was a MAJOR Mediterranean city during ancient times.  It was destroyed once in 146 BC by the Romans before they rebuilt it and Carthage continued to be one of the three most powerful Mediterranean cities.  

It remained that strong until the Muslim conquest and was destroyed again in 698 AD.  Now, all that remains are some ruins overlooking the Mediterranean port.








Barcelona, Spain - 

Home of the famous architecture, Antoni Gaudi.  Gaudi is considered a Modernist when it comes to designs.  

Throughout Barcelona, there are Gaudi creations everywhere, including a church that has yet to be completed.

FCBarcelona... the famous futbal club.  The club has survived throughout the 1800s and into today, being one of the strongest soccer clubs worldwide.

And now... it's back to the real world... Time to prepare for next year.  Only 2 more weeks off...

A Miscellaneous Day...

I love my curriculum days with my coworder Lily.  She is just as (if not more) relaxed and non-structured as I am!  We do a lot of team teaching together, including teaching American History and American Literature together thematically.  It's so easy to sit down with her, sometimes with a few margaritas, and talk out our plans.  So rarely do we actually write things down, unless we need a reminder of something.  It's wonderful!  We come up with different activities and field trips... then, when we know our principal isn't going to be a huge fan of our ideas, we go in together, with a united front, and a way to tie our field trip into the curriculum!  It's so relaxing and doesn't feel like work!  So we did that the other day, while my dogs lay underneath our feet and got one class done.  On Thursday, I'll head to her house and we'll continue to work, only this time on Walk About (a PHENOMENAL independent study class that Lily created based on an Australian tradition).  It's one of my new classes next year that I have to prepare.


The rest of my day... reading!  I've been a reading machine!  Now, granted I can't do much right now since I have a sunburn and should be out of the sun, but still!  I've finished 3 books in about 4 days.  Yes... I do have spare time, but I enjoy this better than lesson planning. 


Currently reading... In the Woods by Tana French.  According to my cousin E, it's a FANTASTIC book.  We shall find out...

A Sad Day...

It truly happens... VERY sad days in teaching.  I got a call today that one of our students, a 17 year old boy, was shot and killed last night.  It's so heartbreaking.  As teachers, we do whatever we possibly can.  We put our heart and soul into helping these kids, but sometimes they just become... stuck.  I know that our school is a Title 1 school (meaning we have a HUGE percentage of students that receive free or reduced lunch... aka we're the poor district), and troubled neighborhoods and problematic lifestyles are common with my kids, but I do become slightly defeated when tragedies like this happen.


What really adds to it is the ignorance of the rest of society.  I was reading the article online, and people posted comments underneath the article.  One post said, "Just build a fence around the neighborhood and let them kill each other."  Another said something to the effect of "bam bam thank you mam..."  What is wrong with people?!  What could possibly bring people to say things like this about other people?  About kids!?  Sure, let's just say their low life gang bangers who made their own choices... but I think that's crap.  Where is the rest of the world to step in and help show these kids there is another way?  Teachers are only around for 9 months... who is there to help them the rest of the year?  We can only help guide them during our school hours... who is there at night to keep them safe and help them realize the amazing potential they have within themselves?


Today is a sad day... and my heart is a little broken...